Apply the rules of a tidy mind
They excise split infinitives
Which are hard to ever find
They scratch out sentence fragments.
A bad idea? Aye!
And a sentence that ends in a preposition
They’ll never let get by
For pedants and editors
Tie themselves in an awful bind
Pedants and editors
Are easy to annoy
Give them a Sunday Chronicle
And watch them self-destroy
Pedants and editors
Have skills that they can deploy
But they’re no damn use to anyone
So they’re easy to annoy
Yes pedants and editors
Are people to enjoy