Pedants and editors

Apply the rules of a tidy mind

They excise split infinitives

Which are hard to ever find

They scratch out sentence fragments.

A bad idea? Aye!

And a sentence that ends in a preposition

They’ll never let get by

For pedants and editors

Tie themselves in an awful bind

Pedants and editors

Are easy to annoy

Give them a Sunday Chronicle

And watch them self-destroy

Pedants and editors

Have skills that they can deploy

But they’re no damn use to anyone

So they’re easy to annoy

Yes pedants and editors

Are people to enjoy